2 and a half days. 1358.5 miles, round trip. $140.40 for gas. Frustration of losing an hour of our lives by doing nothing but crossing a simple state line. Thanks to God for that hour being returned on our trip home. Crazy truck drivers. Stupid (and I use that word loosely because it's the nicest I can be when describing them) Cincinnati drivers. 9 cemetaries. A dozen or so backyard swimming pools. Floods (and I'm sure Noah's ark was in the river at Peoria, IL) up to the roadways. And more laughter than I have ever had with my sister. I should have crow's feet just from this trip. But I don't. Just stating a fact.
Unfortunately, I don't have any of the pictures with me right now so I will get them to you soon. And there aren't many pictures to show because we were so.....scared of getting lost.....in awe of what we were seeing.....and just plain exhausted from driving.....that we didn't take many pictures. Not even of Tyler, Joan and/or Terry. And THEY are the ones we went to see!!!
We took I-80 WB because 34 had some flooding and some of the roads were closed. It was your typical Friday on the interstate. Everybody trying to beat everybody else on the roads. Semi's driving like lunatics. We saw a truck that had Kim Kardashian on it, naked, with the exception of her fur coat she was clinging onto. It was an advertisement for her perfume. She stinks in my opinion, so I'm guessing her perfume does too. And thank God for the fur coat...or whatever it is, she had around her.
As we pass Iowa City, Kathy says to me, "What are those???" I look up only to see 2 H*U*G*E faces staring back at me. I couldn't even tell you WHO they are but there was a man and a woman that scared the beegeezus right out of me. I mean, the last thing you are expecting to see at 75 mph, is a giant head looking you in the eye!!! Weird!! I'm hoping someone can help me out with what that is all about!
Our anticipation mounts shortly after the heart attack previously described, as we are about to Walcott, Iowa. Home of the I-80 truckstop. I have been wanting to go here for a couple of years now. We were at "pee-our-pants" level of excitement when we pulled off the interstate. As we sat at the light, waiting to turn, Kathy says to me, "I wonder why all those busses are over there to the right? Is something big going on around here?" It was the beginning of the trip. I didn't know any better than to look when she said "what's that?" I have since learned my lesson. I look at what has her attention and I realize that those are not busses. Those are campers. RV's. And they are for sale. All one hundred of them sitting there in front of us.
We are like two airheads when we get together, it's true. So we get to this truck stop and just about enter at a dead run. Kathy heads to the potty room and I walk around and look at stuff. Here's your visual of what I was wearing for my long, comfy ride. A newly knitted gray hat that my good friend Shannon made for me that very day, a gray Ashley t-shirt, pink & gray camo pajama pants, tennies, and to top it off.....my favorite purse in the world. Zebra print with bright pink flower on it and bright pink straps. If you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about!
I'm pretty sure I looked the part of a traveling hobo to most (and I got the stares to prove it) but...and I have to say this with head lowered...I was too busy being creeped out by anyone who might have been a terrorist and what my reaction was going to be if someone started acting like a jackwagon. I was still in attack/fear mode at this point, with all that was currently going on in the city of Boston/Watertown.
The truck stop was neat. Kathy flirted endlessly with several men there. She was just non-stop. It was almost embarrassing. For me. Ha!!! She tried to get up into a semi that was on display in the truck stop and couldn't understand how ANYONE could get up in there!! Hahaha there was a sign clearly taped to the door that said "CLOSED DUE TO CONSTRUCTION" and the steps had been taken out so people wouldn't get in it!!! Next time I'm putting a leash on her! Like I said, the truck stop was neat. I think it would be neater for a truck driver that has cash on hand though. Dentist, Chiropractor, Barber, showers...you name it; they had it; for them. But at least I have been there and don't have to wonder anymore. Onward bound.
If, at any time in this or the following Cincinnati blogs, I refer to us going "down" there, I mean over there. The roads had me all turned around the closer we got to destination.
At Davenport, we got onto I-74 and what a mess!!! Water everywhere. This was where it was clearly up to the roadways. It terrified me just a little bit which Kathy didn't understand because I love water. What had me creeped out were all the videos I had watched that whole week about how water can turn a road into a river (literally) in minutes. Yeah...I did that to myself. But we didn't encounter any roadways under water. God and I were talking a lot during this drive.
Let's see...I had us both convinced, at one point, in Davenport, that we were on the wrong road; that we had missed our turn. I think this time I was more the Nervous Nelly than Kathy was! That never happens!!! Never fear, we are still here. On the right road and right on track. Into Illinois we go!!! Over a GINORMOUS bridge! I can't help but gasp and laugh (and boy did she gasp!) because dear Kathy is driving and she is TERRIFIED of bridges. (Maybe you will remember the next time you see a clown dear sister of mine!)
We get into Illinois and with the exception of all the flooding....and don't get me wrong, it was awful to see all those trees and fields and hay bales under water.....there wasn't much else to see. The bore snore I-74 didn't take us through any fun towns. Nothing exceptional to look at. We had to make our own fun. And we did. We laughed the whole time at one thing or another. And Illinois speed limit on interstate is 65. We were shocked. Even Iowa has 70mph!!! I was beginning to think I didn't live in the slowest (and that goes for more than the speed) state after all. People, don't take your great state for granted. There is always worse out there!
At some point along the way, the speed limit was different for truck drivers than it was for cars. I liked that. Those big trucks didn't seem like so much of a threat finally. Got to Peoria about 8:15pm and got a room at the Motel 6. They kept the light on for us and we appreciated that a lot. And it didn't hurt that Kyle...the eye candy at the desk...was super friendly and helpful. Our key was an Applebee's key.....meaning that it had an advertisement for the restaurant. It also said on the back of it that if we went there to eat, we got 10% off our meal. Cool beans, we're in!!
We got the car unloaded and go back up to ask Kyle where Applebee's is at but we have to wait because a man.....85 years old if he was a day.....was checking in.....with a female about 30 years younger than him. I noticed afterward that they arrived in different cars. That makes me shudder and vomit a little bit, in my mouth. Kyle made sure to tell them they couldn't smoke or they would get charges pressed because it was a state law.....which he didn't tell us, not because we are smokers but because he thinks we are the super coolest women he has ever met. He didn't say that but I'm sure that is what he was thinking. After gramps and his friend left, I stepped up to the desk and looked at Kyle and said, "Do you think that couple is going to doink?"
The look on his face was priceless. He laughed and laughed. We all did! So he gives us directions to the restaurant and we get turned around a little bit and finally find it. Get sat down and tell the waitress we have these "coupons." She looks at Kathy's and I look at mine. I spot where it says "in Bradley, IL." Oops!! The waitress and I look at each other and I asked her where that was at and she had no clue!!!! Whoa Nelly!!! She took one of the keys up to the manager and asked him about it. He says that normally they wouldn't honor that but because nobody there even knows where Bradley is, he will give us the 10% off this time. Thanks dude but we were going to eat there no matter what. Score!
Ate dinner and headed back to the Motel. Got a good night's sleep and got refreshed for the morning drive. Let me interject here a moment and just add that I am currently trying to clean up my vocabulary a little bit. I think I overuse that F bomb a lot and it needs to stop. It's not very professional and it sounds awful. Maybe I'm turning into my parents finally, I'm not sure. So, I have yet to go a day without accidentally dropping that bomb. It is 6:02am on Saturday morning and I don't even know what triggered it but I dropped it. Loud and proud. And stopped still as can be and just stared at Kathy with, I'm sure, big eyes. She was just as surprised as I was that I had said it. And so early in the morning!!! I can't for the life of me, imagine what had happened so early in the morning that would make me say that word!!! Now you see why I want to stop saying it!
Back on the road to bore snore I-74 we go. Can't wait to get out of Illinois. It's boring here!
Until next time.........I hope this shows you a little bit about how our trip started out. There's more to come. Don't worry. A lot more. I just hope I can keep my own excitement down to a minimum. Yeah.........I'll do my best!
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