#1: I believe I have a right to my own opinion, just like you do.
#2: I believe I have a right to voice my own opinion and even put it in print, just like you do.
#3: I understand that you may or may not agree with me and may or may not want to state that outloud.
Those are your choices and this blog is MY choice. Nobody elses.
With the current issue of same-sex marriage being legal or not legal, I held my tongue; for a long time. And here is why I held my tongue. I have family and I have friends that are gay. Some that are very close to me and some that are not so close. Either way, they are family; or they are friends; and I respect them.
I sat on top of the fence for so long, watching the two sides battle it out and this is what I saw. For arguments sake, I will use "FOR" and "NOT" as my sides. "FOR" is obviously the side that is for same-sex marriage. "NOT" is not for it. Pretty simple, eh?
"FOR" is pushing for their right to legally marry someone of the same sex, whether it be for love, for insurance, for taxes, whatever. Personally, I don't really care what the reasons are. We all have our reasons, right?
"NOT" is stating that it isn't morally right. It isn't what God planned for His people.
Now.....here is something else that I saw as I was sitting on the fence, afraid to dangle my feet near either side, for fear of having them bitten off or eaten. I've seen the Walking Dead. I know what to do when someone tries to eat you.
Everybody in the "FOR" group kept saying this one thing over and over. "If you aren't in the "FOR" group, you have to hate them." I was dumbfounded. Seriously, I shook my head many times over this because I had never once seen it. I mean, I'm not so naive that I don't know there are haters but out of all the people that I have on my Facebook friends list, not one of them has ever posted that because someone is gay, they hate them...or should die...or be harmed...in ANY way.
I don't know, maybe I just have the coolest friends on earth??? It's a possibility for sure!!!
So I start doing some digging. I look into some groups that I am not connected to, in any way...I start asking people questions; people that I would never talk about such a sensitive subject with simply because #1: I don't want to be involved in a debate about it, and #2: when and if you have 2 sides in opposition, nothing is going to be solved. Hasn't our ridiculous Presidential election proved that?
No matter how much someone posts on Facebook that they support same-sex marriages, it doesn't and won't change the mind of someone who doesn't support it. I'm happy if you support it friend!! And to the other friend, I am happy that you don't support it!! We all have our reasons. We all have our own minds. We all have our own free will. For the sake of french fries, let's just get along people!!!
And then I waited. And I will be honest with you here about what I was doing while I waited to tell the world what "Mrs. Queen Princess Simply Shellie Dispatcher of Death" thinks. I asked around for different Bible chapters that I could read. I talked to people (as I said earlier) about their opinions and why they believed what they believe. Not to be judgmental, but to hear everyone's side. I needed to get as much information as I could. And then...I prayed.
Now, I'm not a public speaker for the church at all. I don't know a whole lot about the Bible, other than what I have learned growing up, in Sunday school and church and what I have seeked out, but I know what I believe and I know, NOW, that I have convictions. And they are a lot stronger than I ever knew they were. God has always been in my life. Always. But it seems in the past few months, He has been with me more and more. The past 2 days I have woken up saying the 23rd Psalm. It's the first thing I think of when I wake up. I don't know why and I don't know what has sparked it.
Unless it's this debate because I can't tell you how much it has affected me. Even I am shocked. I choose the "NOT" side of the fence. No matter how much I have argued and argued with myself, I keep coming back to God. Without going into a long story, this is what I always have at the end: God made Adam and Eve, and as funny as it sounds to say He didn't make Adam and Steve, that is exactly right. God made Adam and Eve so they could procreate. He gave us our own minds and our own free will to make decisions for ourselves. Eve was tempted, and ate the apple. She didn't lay down in the leaves with another female. She didn't ask God to make her a female companion.
I guess I think that if God WANTED us to be with same-sex partners, he would have made us asexual; which means"independent of sexual processes, especially not involving the union of male and female germ cells," according to dictionary.com.
I have several male gay friends and I will tell you that one of them I care a lot about. I have yet to sit down with him and talk about this issue because we have not been able to yet. But we will. He knows something is in the makings with me though. I suppose after this blog, he will know it all. And he will either accept that I have different views then him and we will continue on our path of friendship...or we won't. Who knows what is going to happen. Time will tell.
I have cousins on both sides of my family that are gay. I love them whole-heartedly as well. I will never, under any circumstances, stop loving them for this reason. They are my family, my blood. We don't HAVE to agree on everything. Tell me what family does!!
To be honest, I didn't think I would ever write a blog about this because I figured I would just stay up on top of that fence and never have to say a word but like I said, my convictions on this subject were, and are, a lot stronger than I thought. It's not something I have control over. This comes from my heart and like I said at the beginning, I am not out to offend anybody at all and I am truly sorry if you feel like I am attacking you.
But this is my place to vent and so I am; just like MY Facebook wall is a place for ME to post what I like or what I don't. It's nobody else's concern and if ANYTHING I post on MY wall offends you or hurts you, feel free to exit stage left because you are not going to change my mind when my heart is involved.
I recently posted the below image, to my Facebook wall:
I just thought it was time. Time to let you know what I was thinking and feeling. I was sure you couldn't wait. And I didn't get anything at first. I was really shocked about that. And then I got some "likes" and a few "shares," which made me happy. So I started thinking "ok, I'm good. My friends are okay with me having my own opinion."
And then it comes. Just took a little bit. One person's comment was "...wow," and another's was "thumbs down." Well that was okay. So we disagree, so be it. Doesn't make me like these people ANY less. And then my girl speaks up. I love this girl so much and she doesn't even really realize how much. This is her comment, "I know we have differences but I respect this post! I still love you Shellie no matter what!"
Awww I'm blushing! She's too cute for words!
Apparently, maybe, one of the above commenters thought she was trying to start a debate because she chimed back in and even though it's okay, we should remember that unless someone's name is mentioned, comments are directed toward the owner of the wall. Isn't that how it's supposed to be??? Maybe I live in a different world than the rest. I don't know.
This is what I got from her, "gay people do not choose to be gay, anymore than white people choose to be white or black people choose to be black. They are born that way. To say that you are against it or don't agree is your own choice, but it is a form of prejudice all the same. I do believe we are supose to love one another without prejudices..."
And this, my friends, is my OPINION on that: I am not 100% in agreement that people are born gay. But I don't know. In my world, God made a man and a woman. The goal for Christians is to live how Jesus wants us to live. And we aren't perfect. We are tempted every day of our lives by one thing or another. It's all in what we choose. As for prejudice, according to dictionary.com again..."unreasonable feelings, opinions or attitudes, especially of a hostile nature, regarding a racial, religious, or national group." I don't think my feelings, opinions or attitudes are unreasonable, and they are definitely not hostile. I think there are millions that feel the same way I do. If what I am saying, is prejudice, than so is this girl being prejudice to me.
Then..."it doesnt offend me, I just dont understand how you have gay friends and love them, but yet choose not to support them? That's like not supporting people with cancer. I just don't understand. The post says you do not support homosexuality. You also said you don't have to love their choices. It's not a choice though. They are born the way they are."
"It doesn't offend me..." Apparently it does or you wouldn't keep coming back to poke me with your stick. When I read that she doesn't understand how I can have gay friends and love them but not their choices, I realized why people use the word hate. Hate:"to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; detest."
Here's the word, I think people mean but aren't realizing it: Disagree: "to fail to agree; differ." And that is all I'm doing; disagreeing. I don't hate anybody for their choices. I don't hate anybody period. But I know there are some that do. Please don't catagorize me in that group just because I have a similar belief. Who's judging who now?
And as for the cancer thing sweetie, don't get me started. I have lost many many loved ones to cancer and have family that still fight it everyday of their life. I don't support cancer. I support THEM. And yes, there is a HUGE GINORMOUS difference between homosexuality and cancer. That comment is riduculous.
"? so lets take away the rights that herosexuals have from gay people just because they are gay? You said it yourself that you have been married 3 times (im not against that btw) but why shouldnt they get that right, just because they are gay? we dont even know there is a god, but just for arguments sake lets say there is, who are we to say he is not ok with it? Did he come down and tell us all that it is wrong? Or did we just ASSume it because it's in sone book (that a human wrote) that is suppose to be HIS truth. you are entitled to your opinions, I simple dont agree with statements that are hypocritical. One of these days maybe we will all love and cherish one another for the way we are no matter how different we are made."
I have never stated that anyone's rights should be taken away. Not one time. But what right does marriage give them that they can't have single? Because like I have said numerous times, I have been married as many times as the space shuttle has landed and I have haven't ever been "advantaged" because of it. I pay for my own insurance at my own job. Why can't a gay man? Or a lesbian? Or a transsexual? AND THEN... I see it. I see WHY this person keeps arguing with me. She doesn't even believe there is a God. This is the point where I exit stage right because if you don't believe...can't see it everyday of your life...I am not the person you want to talk to. You need someone else in your life. Seriously. End of conversation.
Sorry friends, that this is so long. It wasn't intended to be but I was afraid it would be. Next up: a lighter, friendlier blog. Phew!!!
The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want;
He maketh me lie down in green pastures.
He leadeth me beside still waters;
He restoreth my soul.
He leadeth me in paths of righteousness
for His name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death,
I shall fear no evil
for Thou art with me
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life
And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
forever and ever.
Amen
Beautifully written :) I love you!
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