Sometimes I Cry

Hello again!  I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and are looking forward to a very, Merry Christmas!  I want to share an article with all of you.  I shared it on my Facebook but I haven't been able to shake what it means to me and how it makes me feel and where it takes my brain so I thought, "What better place to elaborate on the subject?"  If you haven't read it yet, or read it all the way through, please do.  It's a little long but not really long at all.  It is titled "Dear Dispatcher" and here's the link.  

I had literally read the first three lines and then paused the movie my husband was watching so I could read it aloud to him.  Usually, I have a tough time with things like this but I clearly didn't know what direction this was going to take.  By the end, I did have tears streaming down my face but this really did move me.  It makes me happy, thankful, blessed to be able to do the job I do; and to do it well.  

So now that you've read it, I want to tell you what it means to me.  It means that someone actually remembered that there was a compassionate, caring person on the other end of that line when she needed help.  Like she says, nobody calls us when they are having a good day.  It also means that someone remembered that we, the dispatchers, are human.  She understands that when we disconnect from someone's worst nightmare, their nightmare sometimes goes home with us; sometimes for days, weeks, months, and maybe even years.  

This particular blog made my heart swell because I have a chance everyday, to make someone's life better.  If you know my cops, my EMT's, or my firemen, they may tell you I have a knack of making their lives not-so-much-better sometimes but they all know they are a priority to me when I am here.  I want nothing more than to make sure they all go home at the end of the day or night.  This piece hit home with me if for no other reason than to know that someone out there notices.  We aren't just a secretary; we aren't just a telephone operator; we aren't just people that help put other people in jail.  No...we are the first line of communication when you and anyone else needs help.  We are the ones that get to answer your call; not have to...get to!  We are the ones that get the fire departments going; the ambulances sent out; the cops to your location.  Please don't overlook us.  Just because you can't see us, doesn't mean we aren't there and we aren't involved in your story.  We are the voice in the dark.  The voice that chooses to be there to answer your call.  I couldn't be happier to do this job.

As I read the piece, I got to thinking about my relationships with those I work with.  Being in a smaller agency, I am lucky to have great bonds with most of those I work with.  If I have trouble handling something I worked, I know I have a group that will let me talk, will guide me and help me sort out whatever it is that is bothering me, and pretty much go to any lengths to help me solve my issues.  It has taken a while to learn that but I do have a great support system here.  I love that I normally get to hear the "end of the story."  Not always but the majority of the time.  We all have days that we hate our jobs but for the most part, I can't imagine doing anything else; especially without the people I work with now.  Life would never be the same if our team would ever split.  If you are one of my people, please know that appreciative isn't even enough to cover how I feel when I get to hear the "end of the story."

I will close out with this.  In 2018, I have cried for more strangers than I have in the seven years I have worked here.  I thought I was getting soft, weak.  But what I realized is that I am stronger than I have ever been and I doubt I could care any more about people. There are many, many dispatchers out there that have taken more serious calls than I have and there are some out there that haven't.  None of us are ever going to be alike and none of us will ever have the same call volume.  The numbers don't make us great dispatchers.  The heart does.

Sometimes, I want to reach out to some of these people that I go home and cry for. Mostly complete strangers.  Sometimes I just want to send a note saying "I'm glad you're okay," or "Your situation shook me to my core and I just want you to know that I care."  I will never do anything like that of course, but I think about it.  And that helps me deal with "my side of the story."  This job has me doing a lot of praying to the big man upstairs.  I pray daily for those I work with and for those I only get to speak with on the phone.  Again, complete strangers.  Funny how that works.

If you have ever needed help and have dialed 911, please know that the person on the other end of the line is human.  They have a heart and they have feelings and they are going to do whatever they can to help your situation.  It may not make sense to you at the time but bear with us, the questions we ask are for your safety and the safety of whoever we need to send to you.

We're looking for a dispatcher right now.  If you're interested and you think you got what it takes, let me know.  

Look who I found

Hello again!  I made it back and in one piece.  Phew!  I bet you were just as worried as I was!

In my last blog, I talked a lot about Khloe Kardashian and her book and some of the things I have learned from it.  Now, I know I mentioned it but I want to reiterate that first and foremost, I was in search of me, myself and I.  But in order to find me, I first had to muster up some energy to do it and that my friends, has been quite a journey for me.  I have never experienced anything like it.  I don't know if I was in a dark place or if a dark place was following me around because every time I felt like I had finally gotten ahead just a teensy weensy bit...I was back in the mud; couldn't move and didn't care if I ever moved again.  

And then one day, I was handed this stuff.  "Just put it in your coffee and see what happens.  Maybe it will make you feel better."  So that night, when I started work at midnight, I made me a cup of coffee and put this stuff in it.  I was not expecting anything magical to happen.  I was not expecting miracles.  What I was expecting was to tell my person that this was a complete waste of their money.  

By the end of that shift though, I noticed that I was thinking more clearly and I wasn't anywhere near as tired as usual.  I was able to go home after an overnight shift and do some things that I had been putting off because I was just too tired to deal with it.  That made me very happy.  THEN, I remembered a friend posting about this "magic" coffee of hers that was changing her life.  So I did a little research on the stuff and I talked with a couple of friends and next thing I knew, I was ordering this product.

Of course, my order would be late getting to me and I was more than anxious to get started on this stuff.  I was mad at the company, I was mad at the post office, and I was mad at myself for "giving in" to the hoopla.  Clearly this was a sign that I wasn't supposed to do this.  But this gal wasn't going to give up on me.  She gave me samples to get me through until my order got here and I started the program on Wednesday, May 2nd. 

So this is what I do every morning:
*Drink a bottle of water and take 1 capsule (the capsules work with the stuff for weight loss but you don't have to take it).  I'm not good at swallowing capsules so this probably works a few calories off just getting it down.  I can deal with it.
*Make coffee.  I was lucky enough to get one of those nice single coffee makers for Christmas and this is perfect for me because one cup per 8 hours is about all my ulcer will stand and I really do not like to drink coffee alone.  I can handle one cup alone though.  As long as my dog talks with me while I drink it.  ANYWAY...one packet of the stuff goes into my coffee, stir and drink.  Voila, done.  That's it, and I go on about my day. 

Like I said, I was on the search for energy and even though I had ordered and started the weight loss pill, I have not done one single thing to aid in the weight loss side of things.  I have went out to eat in restaurants several times.  I have had a drink or two.  I have not been exercising much, outside of when my Fitbit tells me to get off my ass and walk.  But I had a reason to not do these things.  I wanted to make sure that this was going to give me the energy I needed.  I think I was really wanting to test this product against my worst days.  So, like I said I started it on May 2nd and today is May 11th and I decided to only weigh on Wednesdays but for S's and G's I did it today in hopes I would be able to blog.  Nine days of doing nothing but drinking my magic coffee and taking a pill for no other reason than to have energy.

*In the past nine days, I have push mowed my yard...something I haven't done in a year, and I can't wait to mow again.  Soon, I hope!  My husband's rider needs worked on so I hope that takes a few months to fix.  
*In the past nine days, I have cleaned out my cupboards and purged quite a few things. This is usually something I do about every two months but hadn't done for almost a year.
*In the past nine days, I have started deep cleaning my house and loving it.  Something that has almost always been a norm for me but hasn't been for over a year now.
*In the past nine days, I have not needed a nap before work and I'm not just downright exhausted when I get off work.
*In the past nine days, I have noticed that not only do I remember things a lot better but I feel like my head is finally clear of the "gunk" that got me down.

I mean, other than that, this stuff hasn't helped me at all.  ;-)  So anyway, when I weighed this morning, I realized I was finally back in the 2teens!  It has been more than a struggle for me to get out of those damn 2twenties and I don't ever want to go back.  Nine days, 6 lbs.  Doing nothing but swallowing a pill and drinking a cup of coffee.  I'm perfectly fine and content with that until I get all my stuff done around the house and start back at my workouts.  I keep telling myself "Imagine what will happen when you start working out regularly again!" and I get really, really excited about it.  It has been A LONG TIME since I have been excited about much of anything.

So I am here singing the praises of this wonderful stuff.   Not going to mention a product name yet. Not going to tell you anything more than I have found something that works for me.  I'm sure most of you have enough people shoving weight loss products down your throats.  That's one reason I haven't mentioned this on my Facebook.  I have to hide about 20 posts a day between products and politics because I don't need anybody's opinions but my own.  Nobody is going to change my mind but me.  

Until next time, keep smiling and keep living.  Thanks for reading!

On a journey to find and keep myself

"I feel like the world sees me as fat and lazy" - Mike from Mike & Molly

Boy, have I been there, done that, bought the t-shirt and yoga pants!  I spent many, many years feeling like I was never good enough.  Never good enough for my own siblings at most times of my life.  Never good enough for classmates at any stage of my life.  Never good enough of a friend to most that I have tried to "best" with.

I am just going to warn you right now about this blog. It's about some things that most people are sick of hearing about; two things in particular: Weight loss and Kardashian!!  So, if you are going to be one of those people that roll their eyes at the sight of the above mentioned words, please take your mouse and put your pointer on that pretty red X in the right hand corner.  I don't need that kind of negativity.  And I don't need sympathy either.  I just need to put it out there so I have it on record and can read this over and over and over again, if I feel the need to or just simply choose to.

I feel like I am missing something in my life and I can not pinpoint it to save my soul.  Great job, great marriage, great home life, great family. great job.  So there's the great stuff.  But why do I feel "blah?"Why do I feel like something just isn't right.  Something is definitely amiss and the more I try to figure out what it is, the more exhausted...both mentally and physically...I get!  I have asked for lots of prayers for peace and answers on this one and I'm sure they both will come eventually.  Until then though, I must muster through, whether it kills me or not!

So much has changed in my head and my heart in the past several months.  I have no desire.  I have no motivation to do the things I know in my heart I love to do.  I have literally told myself that I needed to "revisit" the old Shellie and remember what she felt like and why she changed her life and her choices.  So, I have been trying to do that.  Trying to dig deep and find the old me again and see what she can tell me.  It's not easy.  She's all about carbs, pop, and cigarettes and that's so old to me right now that it's new to me.

I was once told that if you "immerse" yourself among healthy people and healthy groups, it will make it easier for you to stick with what is working for you and what is right.  Well, I'm here to tell you that this couldn't be further from the truth.  That stuff has to be in your head.  You can't do things like "diet, lifestyle change and/or exercise" for anybody but yourself!  You have to want it to succeed and I keep telling myself that everyday...sometimes I hear it so much in my head, I get tired of telling myself!  True story!

While I am trying to figure out how to get myself back on track and finding my desire (again), two things that I have "immersed" myself in is a book that I have now read four times: Strong Looks Better Naked by Khloe Kardashian, as well as her new show "Revenge Body."  Her book is so right on when she talks about how this is all about mind, body, and soul.  You have to love yourself; believe in yourself; trust yourself; be yourself.  And that isn't always an easy thing to do.  Especially that last thing.  Being ourselves.  Because we are all so brain-washed into thinking we need to be what our friends, our neighbors, our parents, our lovers, and even our enemies, are.  We need to stop living for everyone else and live for ourselves.  We need to be kind to ourselves.  We need to trust in our own hearts and do what is right BY US, FOR US.

As I said, I have read Khloe's book four times now.  I got it for Christmas a couple of years ago from a former co-worker.  I love reading it and I can always hear her voice speaking to me page after page.
"Slow and steady wins the race,"
"The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday,"
"Nobody likes to be around a Negative Nancy."
Oh, I'm listening Khloe, I'm just a little thick-headed and stubborn at times but keep talking and it will eventually make it's way back through my lead skull.  This book is really good.  She talks about her spiritual journey as well as her emotional and physical journey.  It makes me laugh when she says she was always known as the fat, funny sister because I have never thought she was fat ever.  Yes, I am one of those people that watch Keeping Up With the Kardashians and yes, I will defend them up to a certain point.  While I do not agree with all of their causes or beliefs, I do agree that they are allowed their own.  If you haven't read this book, I recommend it.

Khloe's show Revenge Body started out as a huge joke for me because I thought "Well, she has money, so she can hire a trainer and a chef and voila, her "lifestyle changes" came easy for her.  But I have watched her on Snapchat.  I have watcher her on TV for many years.  And now seeing her on this new show, I have come to realize the most obvious thing on earth.  All that money doesn't mean squat.  Having a trainer doesn't mean squat.  Having a chef doesn't mean squat.  Nobody has put in the WORK that she has, to get the body that she wanted.  For hours and hours, days and days, she put in the effort, the sweat, the tears, and the commitment to get where she needed to be.  And the funny thing about her workouts is that she didn't start working out because she wanted to lose weight or tone up.  She started working out because she lived in a city where she didn't know anybody and went to the gym because she was bored.  She started working through her boredom and then through her frustrations until it became second nature to her.  Even today, pregnant and all, she says she still feels weird if she doesn't get a workout in.

What I love about her show is the compassion she has for others and is willing to help them achieve their goals.  People have all kinds of reasons to be on her show.  Whether it be to get that revenge body for an old or new boy/girl friend, family members, co-workers, themselves!  After the 12 week challenge, most of them have a new perspective on their own health and their own goals to where they are glad they did it for THEM because no matter what you do, there is always going to be a chance that it isn't going to matter to that other person.  Your journey and your goals are not always sufficient and pleasing to others but that shouldn't matter so much to us.  Sadly, it does.

I'd be lying if I said I would rather go on a date night than sit at home and re-read this book or watch another episode because right now, it feels right.  It feels safe.  But even I know that at some point, this has to go somewhere.  It has to get me off my ass and back on my feet.  After all, these news shoes aren't going to exercise by themselves now, are they???

One night I was feeling sorry for myself and thought "I will just send her an email.  Maybe she can give me the words to make it all get better."  By morning, I had come to my senses.  After all the words I have read in her book and all the words she says on her show, what else could she possibly say???  So, to humor myself I googled her show and boom! there pops up the link for the application to her show.  I'm pretty sure my mouth fell to the floor when I read everything they ask you to tell them.  Holy buckets!  I mean, it says on her page that the application is very intimate and takes a long time but ZONKERS, SCOOBY!!!

Take a peek here

I'm going to stop this here.  There is a second part to this blog but I am not ready to reveal that yet.  My brain is in serious overload here about life, health, and my pursuit of happiness on both levels!  If you are still interested, stay tuned!!!

Thanks for reading and have a blessed day, a beautiful week, and a fantastic life!

Ruff day

I am trying to decide what my mood is today; what this feeling is that has gotten me turned in so many directions.  I can't figure out if people are just on my nerves today or if I'm just at the end of my rope or if those two things are the same or not.  Today is one of those days that would be awful to be stuck in my head.  

One thing I definitely can nail down is I'm not tired.  Quintin took care of the dogs yesterday so I could sleep and it was MARVELOUS.  Rarely do I get a day when I'm not the major caretaker of these sweet poopie butts of ours.  Not that they are that much to worry about but they need their fair share of attention too.  And when they gotta go...well, they gotta go.  Doesn't matter if I'm in a deep sleep or not; when the urge hits, mommy gets woke up!!  So by the time they have peed and then walked around the dog pen enough to get their bowels to moving, I'm awake.  Sometimes, they let me have a 45 minute nap before they decide to go; sometimes I get 4 hours in.  It's hit and miss but I wouldn't trade it, even on my worst days.  So now that we are all awake, we have to go inside and wrestle (them, not me) and then kisses for mommy from both girls and then I get to throw the ball for Miss Evie for at least half an hour while Annie watches and I'm sure thanking God she doesn't have to play this stupid game.  She rolls her eyes at Eva a lot.  Couple hours later, they are ready to take a nap and mommy is wide awake.  See, you don't have to give birth to get this treatment!  You just have to love.  

I wish people were more like dogs.  When they get on our nerves we could just shut them outside for a while until either they realize they need to straighten up or we decide we can stand them again.  That may be the only reference I have when it comes to wishing people were more like dogs.  I am thankful...and I'm pretty sure you are too, even if you've never thought about it...that we, as humans, don't sniff each other's butts to see if we know or like each other.  The whole licking thing...yeah I'm glad we don't do that...yick.  

I was telling my husband this stuff a few weeks ago after I had been to school for a refresher for my job.  "Can you just imagine if we went potty like dogs?  There I would be in the middle of my school and have to go to the back corner and sniff around to find a suitable place to squat and pee...or worse, poop!  And how would we clean our butts???  I refuse to slide my butt across the carpet!!!  I mean, every building would have giant sand boxes or pee pads or whatever...and imagine the malls!!!  THINK about how many people potty a day at one mall alone!"  

It was then my husband looked at me lovingly, shook his head and thought about having me put down.  He was afraid I was rabid.  "Where the F*** do you come up with this stuff?"  What else do I have to do when I'm outside with the dogs?  I mean, it's just thinking out loud kinda stuff.  I have questioned him about the church roof and he didn't think there was anything wrong with what I had to say about that.  I told him that every morning I come out with the dogs, I count the little flags in the neighbor's yard.  Eight yellow and eight orange.  That I can easily see from the comfort of my folding chair.  He's used to my counting frenzies that I go on so that's probably why he doesn't think too much about that.  So why think I'm so darn strange because I think of life as a dog.  Men!

I just told a co-worker today that probably the real reason I never had children is because I would have gotten a boy and eventually he would turn into a man and well, today being a man apparently isn't a good thing in my book.  They are just on my nerves.  Not my hubby though.  He's safe for today.  I will say this for men:  I'm glad I'm not you.  Crap, every man should be terrified to look at, speak to, or even have any kind of human interaction with a woman he isn't connected to in some way.  Women coming out of the woodwork to accuse any man that they can find, for anything they can turn into a sexual abuse case.  

Don't get me wrong, if a woman is sexually abused, she needs to be heard and protected.  But she needs to step up and call this situation out because this whole mess of "He sexually abused me 12 years ago" crap just isn't working.  And it's making us women out to look like a bunch of weak, greedy, venomous people.  My mother was none of those and I sure as heck am not one of those.  If someone is going to do something so terrible to me, I am going to stand up and face it now, not years later.  We have become a nation of entitlement.  

Well...this went downhill fast.  I thought I was talking about dogs?  Well...there's no going back now, is there?  I can't even believe I tied those two subjects together once; I know I can't do it twice to get out of it so I'm not even going to try it.  I could always delete it but why would I do that?  These are just my ramblings; my thoughts; my feelings.  Those that don't like it can go fly a kite in Greenland.

I think I'm going to wrap this up.  Have a beautiful day, a marvelous week, and a fantastic year.

Out of hibernation

Well, it's been three and a half months and I thought I should visit again.  Okay, maybe Steph planted that little seed!  And all I had to do was fill out one of those silly little Facebook thingys that reveal little pieces of yourself, your spouse, your life.  Ya know, in case anybody has a fancy notebook that they are writing down every bit of information I share on Facebook.  I thought I would just go back through that list and add insult to injury.

1. What bill do you hate paying the most?  - Cell phone bill

Why?  Not because I believe it's too much money (It is.  Don't get me wrong) but because Verizon...where I want to say they screwed me over...I can't because I wasn't paying attention.  It is more my fault than theirs.  I had a line removed off of our plan a few months ago because I thought it was out of contract.  When I was talking to the rep about removing it, he kept saying "Would you be interested in just keeping it as a prepaid line?"  Why would I do that???  Why???  What he should have said was "Do you realize you have another full year to pay on this device before it's out of contract?"  So as much as I would LOVE to blame Verizon, it is my own fault for not paying attention.  Apparently, it's been a long year!!!  Heck, I thought two had passed!

2. When was the last time you had a romantic dinner? - Well...we went to Taco John's together the other day. Does that count? I mean, he did use a napkin this time!

For those of you that know my husband, you also know that there isn't a romantic hair on his head.  He wouldn't know how to be romantic if he had to so it's a darn good thing he doesn't have to.  God Bless him though.  He tries once in a while.  It's just that his idea of romantic and my idea of romantic are absolutely the opposite things.  I remember one night, sitting in the living room, watching TV and he is engrossed in his phone (funny how that is a normal thing for me now).  I asked him what he was doing and he said he Googled "how to be romantic."  For the love of all things holy and right, UNCLE GOOGLE IS NOT WHERE YOU NEED TO BE LEARNING THIS STUFF!!!  I sound like a mother there, don't I?  "You'll shoot yer eye out!"  But hey, on the bright side, at least he made the effort to "learn," right?

3. What do you really want to be doing?  - Cuddling with my poopie butts (Annie & Eva).

No lie here, folks.  This is one of my favorite pastimes in life.  Cuddling with the dogs.  I lay on the couch and Annie lays behind my legs with her head on my feet.  She knows I have cold feet all the time so she does her best.  Little Eva Diva lays her 9.5 lb. body on my side with her head facing the window so she can see ANYBODY or ANYTHING that comes near our house so she can scare them away...or eat them.  Going back to Annie...if I get up off the couch for any reason, she takes my spot on the pillow.  Little brat.

4. How many colleges did you attend? - Uno...that was enough.

No, I didn't take Spanish.  I thought about going back to college a couple of years ago.  I'm glad I didn't do that.  I'm not sure how finishing a degree in Business Administration would help my life now.  Another student loan to pay off and scrambling to meet schedules of a full-time job and school.  No thanks.  I have never really enjoyed school that much.

5. Why did you choose the shirt you have on now?  - Because my work requires us to wear them...and it's green...and it matches my pants.

I may just leave this one alone.  I'm assuming unless you're a wrestler or a lifeguard, your boss doesn't care if you show up without a shirt.  My boss...he would care very much and let's be honest here... NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT!!!  Let's just move on.  The visuals have started coming.

6. Thoughts on gas prices now?  - None. I'm gonna have to have it no matter what.

Pretty true statement there too.  When gas was outrageously high, we still bought it, didn't we?  We may not have went far on our family vacations through that, but we still bought gasoline.  I could always switch to an electric car but no...I don't want to do that.  I love my SUV.  I, like so many others, remember exactly what I was doing when the twin towers were hit in New York. on 911.  I was working at Godfather's Pizza/Bedford Country Store and I will never forget how long the lines were to get gasoline after that happened.  I can still hear Kristi in disbelief saying "Is one tank of gas going to make that much difference?"  And she was right.  Why do people do that?  It's not like, upon attack, we are going to hoard our gasoline!  Heck, we're going to be fighting for our lives! Anyway...

7. First thought when the alarm goes off in the morning?  - I don't use alarm clocks. That's the beauty of working at night.

This is a funny one.  I did actually set my alarm last night because I was having a terrible time falling asleep and I was afraid I was going to oversleep.  So I set the alarm for 22:45 (that's 10:45 pm for those of you not in the know), and just like it was supposed to do, it went off.  I got up and slipped on some sweat pants and grabbed a shirt and headed downstairs.  The dogs thought they needed to potty so I took them outside and talked to them while they piddled.  I happen to look down and my Fitbit flashed the time.  "Did that say 23:51?"  I tapped it and again read 23:51.  If I would have had time, I would have crapped my pants, but I didn't!!!  And my heart started beating in double time.  You know how it feels when you are running late for something important and when you finally arrive, you are still in hyper mode and it takes F-O-R-E-V-E-R to get back to normal!  I ran in the house, luckily no injuries to either dog as they ran in with me, and said "Quintin it's 10 till midnight and I'm going to be late! GO TO BED!  Yeah, he was asleep in his chair.  I didn't even wait for an answer because I was running up the stairs to get some jeans on an make sure my newly permed hair wasn't too much out of whack!  "Screw it, I'm wearing the sweatpants.  They will just have to deal!"  As I started down the stairs in my mad fury, I happened to look at my phone that was about to go into my pocket.  22:53....check the Fitbit...22:53...of course I read it wrong.  Who am I to think I need to be completely awake before making such a decision in my life!  And, as I said before, it took me forever to really wind down and get out of that "I'm late" frenzy!  I just realized how much I have to mother this husband of mine.  What a baby.

8. Last thought you have before you go to bed? - OK so this may be a little weird but literally, the last thing I do before going to sleep is ask God to keep my deputies safe that night.

My prayers are mostly always with these other guys I seem to mother too much.  Dang deputies always taking up all my time!  I can't even go to sleep without thinking about them...and their safety!  But seriously, not just the guys I work directly with, all of "my" guys are included in my prayers.  Too many bad things out in our scary world these days.  Nobody is truly safe.

9. Do you miss being a child?  - Sometimes but only because I miss my parents.

I don't have a problem being an adult.  I have a problem not being able to talk to my dad and mom.  Sometimes I think how easy life would seem if I could just go sit on their couch with them while they watched TV.  I can still hear dad's boisterous laughter and mom shaking her head.  It's the simple things.

10. What errand/chore do you despise the most? - Grocery Shopping for the win!

I've made this pretty well known.  I hate going to the grocery store.  Always have.  Always will.  And if my hatred for the grocery store isn't enough, our local Fareway extended their aisles and it sucks!  Don't get me wrong, I'm all for walking the extra mile for just about anything in life but when they took out the middle aisles (if you're not familiar, Fareway used to have half-aisles and you could cut through at the halfway mark instead of going to the complete end of the aisle...I'm shutting up on this now), they also moved everything in the store.  The bread has moved.  The candy has moved.  The veggies have moved.  AND NONE OF THEM GAVE A FORWARDING ADDRESS!  I just can not stand it when a grocery store revamps their stuff.  Makes me want to stop shopping there!

11. Up early or sleep in? - Look...if I get 4 hours at a time, I don't care what time of day it is, it's a good day!

Yes, this.  Except it was supposed to say 4 uninterrupted hours of sleep.  That's perfect.

I'd be lying if I told you I'm not exhausted right now.  Wow, lazy Shellie.

12. Found love yet? - I guess so.......at least that's what he tells me

Oh Quintin!  For all the grief you give me...dirty socks stuck in the back of the couch, toilet seat left up, demolitions, additions, doggy chores...for all of that, I wouldn't trade you for the world.  How did you get so lucky???

13. Favorite lunch meat?  - Bologna or hot dogs (that's lunchmeat kinda, right???)

I know there are so many people out there that will tell me not to eat that cheap stuff but I would just have to agree to disagree.  I don't care if it's made of snips, and snails, and puppy dog tails.  If it takes that good, I'm in.  Come to think of it, Eva does have a short little tail.....................

14. What do you get at Walmart every time?  - Bread...the bread you eat.

That explanation was for my readers with a dirtier mind than I have.  I just knew if I didn't specify, someone was going to ask me if I got bred by the people of Walmart.  For the record, the answer is: not every time! HA!  My husband eats so much bread it's almost disgusting.  I love bread as well but I can't eat it everyday.  I just can't!

15. Beach or lake?  - Neither?

Is it terrible that I don't care for either of these?  I like them both but I can't leave them as easily as take them.  Just give me an indoor pool where I can swim laps and not worry about that sun blazing down on me.

16. Is marriage overrated?  - No! I love being married! That's why I keep doing it again and again and again!

I have been married three times.  I love to be by myself but I also love to spend time with my husband.  Whether he likes it or not!  Marriage is a beautiful thing when you find that person that wants to give as much as you do.

17. Ever crashed a vehicle?  - Oh yes!

While I can say I have never (yet) head-on crashed into anybody, and I hope I never do, I can say that I have been the driver on one occasion, the passenger on one occasion, and it wasn't very fun either time.  Just say no to crashes!!!  No bueno!

18. Strangest place you've brushed your teeth?  - In my car.

I've done many strange things in my car so I'm thankful brushing my teeth was the question!  I have disposable toothbrushes and flossers in my car at any given moment.  You never know when you're going to need some oral hygeine!

19. Somewhere you've never been but want go?  - Arkansas, to see family

Okay, maybe I want to go to London too but Arkansas is on my short list.  I have wanted to go see my cousin Josh, and his beautiful family for years.  I will make this happen!

20. At this point in your life would you want to start a new career?  - No. Just no.

I love where I'm at in my career.  I love the people I work with.  I love helping people and making a difference.  I think I'm pretty good at my job most days and it has been a fit for me since day one.  I wonder why.....

21. How old are You?  - Almost the big 5-0!

I may be 48 but I feel like I'm 28 in all honesty.  Except for those times that I feel 78 and those other times I wake up and look in the mirror and see 58.  Yep, I'm a hot mess all over the board but you wouldn't want me any other way!

22. Do you have a go to person? - Yes. Two of them. Lucky me.

I actually do realize how lucky I am and do not take for granted the two people that I get to call when things aren't going so well, when I am so stressed out I don't know what to do, when things are going so awesome in life that I just can't contain myself!  These two guys are always there when I need them to be.  They take me at my best and they take me at my worst and I couldn't be more blessed than that!

23. Are you where you want to be in life?  - Yes. Finally!

Is it just me or are we typing in circles now?  I mean, we covered love, career, and our go-to people, so what else is life?

24. Growing up what were your favorite cartoons?  - Tom and Jerry.

It's funny that it took me forever to think of what my favorite cartoon was.  This is what I came up with.  I would sit and watch Tom and Jerry for hours.  And I don't remember it being "funny" to me.  It was mindless watching at it's finest, I guess.  Same goes for Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote.  I never laughed at that but I always kept watching.

25. What do you think has changed about you since you were a teenager?  - I learned that I need to please me instead of anybody else.

This is the important one of all I believe.  It has taken me forever to get here so I'm not going to waste a minute.  I feel my answer came across as I need to please myself instead of everyone else when it should come across as "I need to learn to put myself first sometimes just like I do others" because I try to do a lot of things for a lot of people.  The homeless people especially.  It has really become a cause for me and I don't ever want to stop.  I probably never will.  It is so second nature for me to come across something I haven't worn or used in over a year and think "This needs to go to someone who can use/love it because I am not using it." And I try to keep stock of the toiletry items because I can always go out and buy my own, they can not.

Speaking of, if you have made it this far and are interested, I am taking some stuff to the mission in March.  I would love to have some donations of toilet paper, shampoo, and/or soaps, as well as gently used clothing and plastic bags.

Well, congratulations.  We all made it.  We survived the great (LONG) blog of 1/2018.  I'm exhausted.  I'd love to go to bed but I don't see that happening for a long time now.  Have a beautiful day, a blessed week, and a plentiful year.....because I have no idea when I'll find my way back here!