mY pRAYER

i'M BACK.  dON'T KNOW FOR HOW LONG.  i HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT MY BLOGS ARE JUST TOO DAMNED LONG AND PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO READ SOMETHING THAT LONG.  i SAY IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ THEM, GET THE HELL OUT.  iT'S MY PAGE, i CAN SAY WHATEVER THE HELL i WANT. 

i HAVE BEEN AROUND LAW ENFORCEMENT MY WHOLE LIFE AND DISPATCHERS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A PART OF MY FAMILY; A PART OF ME.  pROBABLY NO SURPRISE TO ANYONE THAT i ENDED UP BEING ONE OF THEM.  i'M GLAD i DID THOUGH.  i LOVE MY JOB.  bUT JUST THE JOB. 

tHE THING i HATE ABOUT MY JOB THOUGH, IS THE DEATHS.  i'M PRETTY GOOD ABOUT SHRUGGING THINGS OFF AND i KNOW, LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, SHIT HAPPENS.  i LIKE TO THINK THAT i AM TOUGH AND FOR THE MOST PART, LESS STRESSED THAN MOST PEOPLE.  mAYBE IT'S TRUE.  mAYBE IT'S NOT. 

i HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT LIVING IN AN AREA WHERE i DON'T REALLY KNOW A LOT OF PEOPLE, i WOULDN'T BE AFFECTED BY DEATHS.  uNTIL THE OTHER DAY.  i HAD A CALL ABOUT A MAN THAT FELL TO HIS DEATH.  i CAN'T GET THAT OUT OF MY HEAD. 

i HAVE PRAYED MANY MANY TIMES FOR THIS MAN.  fOR HIS FAMILY.  i HAVE HOPED THAT HE HAD A MASSIVE HEART ATTACK BEFORE HE HIT THE GROUND BECAUSE IT'S AN AWFUL THING TO THINK OF HIM HITTING THE GROUND AND DYING THAT WAY.  iT BRINGS ME TO TEARS. 

dID i MENTION THAT i HAD NEVER MET THE MAN?  tHAT i WOULDN'T HAVE KNOWN HIM FROM aDAM?  i KNOW HIS NAME AND ADDRESS AND THAT'S IT. 

i KEEP THINKING ABOUT HOW HARD IT'S GOING TO BE FOR HIS WIFE THIS cHRISTMAS.  hOW SHE IS GOING TO LONG TO HAVE HIM AROUND.  hOW IS FAMILY IS GOING TO GO OVERBOARD TO KEEP HER MIND OCCUPIED AND MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHE IS LOVED AND NEEDED.  bECAUSE THAT'S WHAT WE DO AS FAMILILES.  wE TAKE CARE OF OUR OWN.

i HAVEN'T HAD TO DEAL WITH ANYTHING, AS A DISPATCHER, THAT MY CO-WORKERS HAVEN'T HAD TO DEAL WITH.  aND i DON'T KNOW WHY THIS one MAN'S DEATH IS GETTING TO ME. 

i'M GOING TO END THIS BY ASKING YOU TO DO SOMETHING FOR ME.  tHINK OF SOMEONE THAT YOU KNOW...THAT YOU DON'T SEE VERY OFTEN...THAT MAYBE YOU HAVEN'T SEEN FOR YEARS...NOW...STOP AND SAY A PRAYER FOR THAT PERSON.