I should blog, huh? It's been a little while since my last post. I see a lot of traffic went through on that one. I got a lot of feedback too...that made my head spin a little bit. I think I should hold a class. One where I teach people to speak their minds and not worry so much about the consequences. No matter what...you won't die from speaking your mind. Well wait.........you could die..........if you spoke your mind to the wrong person I guess..........and they killed you.
On second thought, why don't you just let ME do the mind speaking, okay??? There's no sense in ALL of us getting the hell beat out of us!!!
So some of you know that I dropped my phone in the crapper last week. Happy Friday to me!! It was kinda fun not having a phone. Now I know how Bertha feels when she turns her off. Gee told me once that he put his in the refrigerator. What the hell??? He says it got too hot but I really think he did it so he wouldn't have to answer me when I called him.
Anyway, guess what was in my phone.....that went in the crapper.....yep, my list of blog topics. C-R-A-P!!!! CRAP CRAP CRAP!!! I had some good ones in there too, I tell ya! Like the notes about Gee and I going to C-town and he pulls into Oh-Oh-Oh-O'Reilleyyyyyyys.....Auto Parts! He told me he would be right back. I guess that meant he didn't want me to go in with him. Nevermind that it's six hundred and thirty seven degrees outside and at the time, we didn't have any air conditioning in the Cadillac nut-dragger. *sigh*
I remember seeing a family...I suppose it was a family...come out of Oh-Oh-Oh O'Reilleyyyyyy.....Auto Parts! that I didn't think looked like your typical mechanical family. The woman whom I assume to be the woman did not like dirt or to be dirty. I will tell you why in a moment. The woman I assume to be her daughter was dressed in too-short-too-tight-shorts. She wasn't overweight by any means but I think it was then I learned that even skinny people can wear stuff that they shouldn't.
The "daughter" had a small child and it was a boy. Well, what do boys like to do when they are outside? Play in the dirt!! And this little boy was no different. He headed right for a pile of dirt while the two women were standing next to the car trying to convince some guy in a muscle shirt that they knew what they were talking about when they mentioned some car parts.
In the end, the "mother" did say she didn't really understand, she just ordered the stuff they said she needed. I bet Oh-Oh-Oh-O'Reilleyyyyyyy's......Auto Parts! loves mechanically impaired/challenged women. I shouldn't say women. I should say people. Because there are some men out there that just don't know what the "fun" they are talking about. (Fun is my new "F" word) I know. I was married to a couple of them.
Anyway, let me back up a bit here. Before they headed out, the "mother" needed to go back inside and so while I was sitting there sweating my "fun" ass off, I watched closely. Because we both know how entertaining people are to me. All of them. The "daughter" was not watching her little boy very good because she was too intent on talking to the bigger boy and well, eventually that little boy moved from a pile of dirt to an oil stain in the parking lot.
I thought maybe I should tell her. The little boy kept looking at me like "you aren't going to tell, are you?" I just smiled at him like "stick yer face in it, kid." So the kid is getting dirtier by the second and I am starting to get a good giggle worked up. If anything, it took my mind off of the temperatures and how miserable I was sitting in the vehicle while my husband was standing in the air conditioning, enjoying himself.
Yes, so I was trying not to make a sound because I truly wanted to see just how dirty this kid could get. And then the "mother" walks out of the building and says "Do you see what your son is doing??" The "daughter" then turns around and scolds her son...and I just watch. I have my sunglasses on so she doesn't really know where I'm looking. But I was looking right at her and her dirty kid. Enjoying myself immensely.
She reaches down to pick him up and O-H E-M G-E-E.....that woman had probably never once shaved her armpits. It was disgusting! I've never seen hair on a woman's pits like I saw that day. And yes, she had on a sleeveless top!! WHY??? wHy?? Can anyone help me out with this one?
At least it stopped my laughter at her son. Yep, perdy much stopped it dead in it's tracks. Turned it from laughter into vomit. Vomit that I had to swallow back down because it was WAY TOO HOT to be vomiting all over myself or in my car where I would have to clean it up!!
I don't think I lasted too long after that though. I think I ended up going in and pressing my head on the concrete floor and making my dear (cool) husband realize that it was too "fun-ing" hot to be out in that car that long so maybe we should go home now.
That's about all I can remember from my phone. I doubt my notes from the other phone will be in the new phone...that comes either today or tomorrow...I am excited...I can't wait...can you tell??? I will have to get new notes I suppose.
I promise my new notes will be kept somewhere besides my phone. I have a plan. Yeah, a plan. Until next time..........we still need rain, badly. I think it's too late for our crops but the rain is so welcome. I rolled my windows up today because Gee said it was going ot rain. He shouldn't tease. Or come home if it doesn't rain. Jus sayin.
Rain dances everyone, please!
No comments:
Post a Comment