Dom da-dom dom

Hey hey!  Welcome back! I had begun to think you had gotten lost and couldn't find me.  I have been sitting here just WAITING for you to get here so I would have someone to talk to.  So what's new with you?  Is it hot there?  Cuz it's going to get hot here today.  I'm over that.  Bring me some nice breezes and temps of 75 and I'm a happy gal.

I went down to clean for my friend DOM the other day.  I've noticed that since I have started to really get in there and clean, he leaves earlier and earlier each time.  I really like that.  Gives me a chance to move the furniture and do the things that really need done. 

I took my carpet shampooer down with me this last time and got all his poopy stains out of his carpet.  Lucky for me, there were only two spots to work out and it only took about forty five minutes to thoroughly clean all the areas that could use some attention. 

While organizing and re-arranging, I completely cleaned out his refrigerator.  You know those crisper drawers??  Well I will be damned if they weren't just stocked FULL of candy.  Mini Snickers, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Reese's Mini's, Hershey's candy and I can 't even remember what else. 

As I started looking at all this candy he had, I realized that half of the bags were wrappers.  Only wrappers.  So I dug ALL the empty wrappers out of the bags and put them in the trash where they belong.  When I got all of those out of there, there really wasn't all that much candy.  Okay, well there WAS..........but not near as much as I thought he had to begin with.  So I took them all and condensed them into Ziploc baggies. 

So when I was done, the refrigerator looked FAN-freaking-TASTIC!!  Don't worry.....I left a note "suggesting" that maybe he was purchasing too much candy and needed to think about snacks that were just a little bit more healthy.  Just a bit.  I'm sure that note went into the trash can immediately. 

On another note, I found a whole new black trash bag just FULL of movies.  Yes.....those movies!  And how lucky was it that he just happened to have a whole bottom shelf in the bathroom EMPTY???  With a door on it???  Oh yes, they ALL went in there!  The funny thing I have noticed when finding spots for his movies is that none of them have been opened.  Okay well maybe not NONE of them but clearly ninety nine percent of them. 

So I truly believe he gets these movies because he wants to spend his money.  Not because he wants to watch porn.  And like I have mentioned before.....those bastards at the porn shop........I mean pawn shop, need to be whipped.  With spiked strips of leather.  Sharp spikes.  I hate it that they will take advantage of someone that is so clearly not able to make the right decisions.  *sigh*

So while putting these movies away, I saw just how clever these titles can be. 
Teasers - I always thought those were books.  Guess I was wrong.

China Doll, featuring cocksuckers - Need I say more?

Pussy Cream - Gross.  And what they don't know is that it's really called penicillin, not cream.

Fucking the Fat Man - Everybody needs love people.  It's just that not everybody needs to videotape it.

Ghetto Fuckfest - Yes, it's just what you thought it was.

Meat - No, it's NOT a cookbook.

Pretty as they Cum - I'm sorry but skanky garter belts, high heels, stockings and masks just don't seem "pretty" to me.

Pitcher's Mound - It didn't LOOK like a baseball movie!!

Up and Cumming - Gross.  That means teenagers.  Or at least that's what they want you to think.  Gross.

No cocks allowed - What??  Why??  And are they just anti-chicken or anti-all-meat???

The best of MILF's, featuring sticky girls - Ewww.  I have a mom.  I think this is gross.  I don't care how "hot" they are.  They are moms.  Stop!

Sweet & Sour Snatch - This one speaks for itself.  Volumes!  I think I will pass on chinese food for a while.

Slutty sistas - I love my sisters but............no.  HELL NO!

My First Ass Reaming - Does this mean she gets yelled at?  Isn't that what ass reaming means??

So anyway, that was my entertainment while cleaning this time.  When I was done, I was looking around and I have decided that INSTEAD of having all his movies (that he doesn't even watch) strung around the place, hiding in all corners, that I am going to find either one large or two small bookshelves to put in his big closet and put them all on there.  I am also going to try to find a small used dresser to put his extra sheets and blankets in so they aren't just cluttering up his closet.  And that is going to be his Christmas present.

What do you think of that?  Any suggestions on where I am going to find this stuff?  I will see if any of the surrounding "neighborhood centers" have any of this stuff and I guess I will see if I can get my happy ass up in the mornings on weekends that I don't have to work early and check out some garage sales. 

I got a lot to do.  And although I'm not done talking, I am done talking about this subject.  Any and all suggestions on how I can add to this Christmas present for my special friend Dom would be appreciated.  Be watching for another blog.  I have it started in my mind.  How scary is that???